That
Michigan game was SICK! It was like watching a live action XBox game. I
have no idea how Robinson completes some of those throws. He literally
would just toss it up for grabs and Michigan's WR's must be used to it
b/c they came down with the catch more often than not. The fact that it
was the first night game ever at the Big House made it even better.
On to week 3...
Big Ten:
Directional
Michigan @ Michigan - After last week's excitement, Aliens would have
to land on the 50 yard line at halftime and Elvis would have to come off
the ship and provide the half time entertainment for this game to be
anywhere close to last week. Michigan will have a let down, how could
they not, but E
Mich is one of the worst teams in college football. Michigan rolls
after a slow start 45 - 10.
Penn
State @ Temple - This is a de facto home game for the Nittany Lions.
You'll probably see less red in the stadium this week than you did in
Beaver stadium last week. Given PSU's track record of starting slow on
the road, combined with this being a Noon kickoff and coming off a big
game loss, this game will be MUCH closer than anyone thinks. PSU's
offense will struggle, especially in the first half, and Temple's O will
come out firing and take our D by surprise. PSU will be down going
into the second half, but superior talent should win out in the end.
PSU wins this one in the 4th quarter thanks to a Silas Redd TD run. 27 -
20 PSU.
Pitt @
Iowa - The Hawkeyes are coming off a horrible loss to their in state
rivals. Apparently Iowa sucks against everyone but Penn State. Pitt,
on the other hand, just sucks. On a side note, apparently if PSU's DC
Tom Bradley got Pitt's HC job, he was taking 3 or 4 of PSU's staff with
him. And Joe being the age he is and not being able to actually coach
anymore but capably filling the role of "Honorary Head Coach for Life",
he would have retired rather than go find new staff he'd have to break
in. The Pitt BoT nixed Bradley to Pitt, therefore, I blame Pitt for
JoePa not retiring, and indirectly, Mark May since I'm sure he donates
to the school. I f'ing hate Mark May. Iowa 26 - Pitt 23
SE
Mizzou State @ Purdue - I'm hesitant to predict any wins for the Big
Ten going forward, especially for Purdue who lost to Rice. Seriously,
who loses to an asian side dish? The Boilers QB Robert Marve, the
transfer from Miami, may make his
debut this week. He can't be any worse than whoever threw the ball for
the Boilers last week, so we'll see. Can Purdue lose to a 1AA team?
We'll see, but I think they may have a shot in this one. Boilers 35 -
SEMS 14
SC State
@ Indiana - The second best college football team in Indiana (next to
Ball State) takes on a 1AA team. Ugh. I know one of the Big Ten
schools will blow it this week, but it's tough picking which one. I'll
take this one I guess. SC State continues the Big Ten year of
Embarrassment beating the Hoosiers 31-29.
Sparty
@ The Irish - THIS is the week the Irish finally turn it around, and
are BACK BABY! The Irish are freakin' back!!! WOO HOO!! CHEER CHEER
FOR OLD NOTRE DAME! (because the new one blows). Of course, Sparty
being Sparty, they are bound by
their own traditions of losing to an inferior opponent. This usually
happens late in the year, however Dantonio gets an early start on it and
let's Brian Kelly's blood pressure to come down slightly for a week.
The O/U on turnovers for this game is 5. I'm taking the over. Notre
Dame 40 - Sparty 31
Non-Cheating
Miami @ Minnesota - Minny's coach is apparently going to be on the
sideline for this game after having a seizure last game. Minny wins one
for the Kill(er)! Minny 27 - Miami OH 16
Huskies
@ Huskers - Huskers were so close to officially being a Big Ten team
last week by coming close to losing to an inferior out of conference
opponent. Alas, the Huskers were able to pull one out against Fresno
State. Unfortunately this week the Huskers finally get on board with
that Big Ten tradition. The
Huskies get a win in Lincoln, 37 - 34.
Northwestern
@ Army - Army had San Diego State at home last week, now Northwestern,
how does Army get all these teams to come play in West Point? Is it a
recruiting ploy? Do they set up recruiting stations in the opposing
teams locker rooms? "A Northwestern degree is worth nothing in today's
job market. Come join the Army and see the world!" Then again, that
same pitch to San Diego State would be accurate. Wildcats 37 - Knights
17.
Badgers @
Huskies - Wisconsin heads south, to Northern Illinois. There is nothing
remotely interesting about this game. Although the Badgers are in the
Big Ten, so there is always the potential to blow it. Badgers roll 45 -
10.
Arizona
State @ Illinois - the Sun Devils leave the
hot, dry confines of Tempe to meet up with the Zooker in Champagne.
The Sun Devils are so perpetually underachieving, they could play in the
Big Ten. And Zook loves losing games he shouldn't. That makes this
one a tough one to call. ASU is ranked and should be favored, but
Illinois is playing at home. Since I'm watching the Illinois @ USC game
circa 1989 on the BTN right now, I'll take the Fightin' Illini 33-30.
(I forgot how good Jeff George was in college. I do remember he is the
poster boy for having all the talent in the world, and being the
biggest asshole at the same time. Can you think of any other players
that were so talented but couldn't get help but be such a dick that they
sabotaged their own career?)
The
Ineligi-BOWL! - So.... TP spent his time getting ready for the draft
by... paying current OSU players? Seriously
Cobra!! What is up with OSU!? It's like they can't help themselves!
Do we need an intervention? Should the entire program go to a rehab
center in Malibu for a few months? Hey! TP can pay for it!! I also
love that TP is appealing his suspension, after saying he wouldn't
appeal so he could be eligible for the supplemental draft. Talk about a
kid that could give a shit about the rules. He's learned absolutely
nothing through this whole scandal. Are there any Buckeye boosters
doing time in federal prison willing to spill the beans?
Meanwhile, down in Miami, Golden is still trying to figure out what the hell hit him.
The
NCAA should save themselves time and money, and just declare that
whichever team loses this game gets the death penalty. So long 'Canes!
Buckeyes 24 -
13.
Top 25 Action:
#1
OU @ #5 FSU - The Game of the Week!! Is FSU officially back after
rebuilding from forcing out their legendary coach who was too old to do
the job anymore (ahem... cough cough... penn state), or are the Sooners
really the best team in the nation and looking to give the Big XII one
final championship before disbanding? This one should be a good one.
Florida State's home field advantage wills them to a win... 37 - 34
'Noles.
North
Texas @ #2 'Bama - This one gets uglier than a botched nose job, boob
job, and collagen injection all at once... 55 - 3 'Bama. Roll Tide.
#3
LSU @ #25 Miss State - The Bulldogs lost a heart breaker last week.
Then again, why do you run the ball with 6 seconds
left knowing you need a TD and the clock will run out if you get
stopped short of the goal line? Wouldn't it make sense to pass so you
potentially get two plays? And if the pass isn't there, they have a
mobile QB who could run it anyways if the clock was running out. Seems
like a terrible play call. After sticking to solid foods last week, the
Mad Hatter will be chewing allot of grass this week. Tigers 40 -
Bulldogs 30
#4
Boise @ Toledo - Boise got hit hard with sanctions! Amazing how the
NCAA comes down hard on some programs, but not others. And seriously
Boise, cheating in women's tennis? That's like cheating on an open book
practice test. At least have a former player that had to leave school
b/c he received extra benefits pay your current players, or have your HC
resign in disgrace b/c he tried to cover up his players cheating, or
get a
convicted felon to reveal every dirty little secret about your
program. Even Boise's cheating doesn't belong in an auto-bid BCS
conference. The Rockets are out of fuel after almost beating the
Buckeyes last week. Broncos 42 - Rockets 24.
#6
Stanford @ Arizona - The Heisman campaign continues for Andrew Luck,
this time in the desert. You think Luck is rooting for Peyton Manning
to be out for the year so he at least has a shot at going to the Colts
instead of a shit hole like Cincy or Buffalo? Cardinal roll 34 - 13.
#8
Oklahoma State @ Tulsa - T. Boone likes the idea of OSU heading to the
Pac 12, neigh, Pac 16! And why not? He'll get to compete head to head
with Phil Knight to see how can give more money to their football
teams! Can we please name this annual matchup the Oil v. Sneakers
Bowl? Cowboys win big in Tulsa - 35 - 10.
Idaho
@ #9 Texas A&M - how pissed do you think A&M is at Baylor right
now? I really wish these two schools played each other this week.
They could play for the rights of A&M to leave for the SEC. The
only better would be the Death Penalty Bowl between OSU & Miami.
A&M smacks the Vandals 47 - 13.
Navy
@ #10 South Carolina - The Gamecocks made Mark Richt's seat extremely
hot last week. This week they sink the Midshipmen 45 - 7.
Mizzou
State @ #12 Oregon - How many Mizzou State's are there? You think
Mizzou State proper looks down theirs noses at SW Mizzou State? Do the
dumb people go to directional Mizzou State? Is it like being the
tallest person at a midget convention?
Does Oregon notice there is another team on the field this week? 59 - 0
Ducks.
Ark
State @ #13 Va Tech - Frank Beamer just signed an extension. If he
stays 20 more years in Blacksburg, he's approaching JoePa status. I
feel bad for the Hokies if that happens. The Hokies score twice on
special teams and roll 47 - 9.
Troy
@ #15 Arkansas - The Razorbacks finally stop laughing from the phone
call from the Big XII. Troy is neither the Troy of Southern Cal, nor
the 2nd best team in the state of Alabama. They do put up some points
though. Razorbacks 45 - Trojans 31.
Tennessee
@ #16 Florida - The Volunteers have been terrible since Phil Fulmer
left, but the good news is Peyton Manning might be available for
coaching positions soon. Meanwhile, in the
Swamp, Muschamp is busy trying to fill Meyer's shoes. Do you think
Florida fans are as delusional as Notre Dame fans? I mean they've
actually had some recent success, and play in a talent rich state, and
their program has a good tradition, yet you never really hear them
declare how they are BACK year after year. Also, I hate Mark May.
Gators 37 - 24.
#18
Mountaineers @ Terrapins - Well, I guess ugly uniforms is one way to
get some buzz around your program. I wonder if Maryland is about to
become Oregon East. They have a sports gear benefactor donating tons of
money and giving them their own duds whenever they want, a new coach
that's had some success elsewhere, and play in a conference without a
dominant program at the moment.
Stephen
F. Austin @ #19 Baylor - The Bears are desperately trying to stay
relevant in college
football and promote the Heisman Campaign of Robert Griffith III. I
wonder what Robert Griffith I & II did to want to carry on the name
to the III? Another Texas mismatch... Bears clobber whatever SFA is
called 52 - 7, then prank call A&M pretending to be SEC Commissioner
Silve.
Florida A&M @ #20 South Florida -
The Bulls are still riding high after their win in South Bend, and
don't notice just how bad the Irish really are. Luckily they get a
cupcake this week.... mmmmm.... cupcakes. Josh - you should bring the
guys some Sprinkles cupcakes for the Purdue game. They are seriously
the best cupcakes you will ever have. Bulls 46 - 3.
#21
Tigers @ Tigers - There are allot of Tigers in college football. Rumor
is Clemson may be joining the SEC too... though another program that
disappoints on a yearly basis is not what the SEC needs.
Auburn has been getting by on luck and.... well actually just luck.
Their luck runs out this week though. Clemson takes it to them 31 - 21.
LA-Monroe @ #23 TCU - Well I wrong about
TCU last week, so I'm picking them to win this week. And their D shows
up. 36 - 0 TCU.
Games of Note:
The
Battle of the Book of Mormon - Utah @ BYU - The Utes and Cougars almost
pulled off dual upsets last week. This week, the Cougars get the win,
the students celebrate by confiscating booze & not lighting anything
on fire. Cougars 37-24
Upset of the week:
I don't know... let's go with Coastal Carolina over Georgia....
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